So after eight and a half years, OZ are disbanding. And I am very very sad.
I like to talk about bands who create a world of their own (indeed, any good band should), and OZ's world is very unique; dark and fluid, rough edges, a landscape of jagged rocks all effortlessly traversed by Natsuki's twisting and turning vocals. They are a band with a signature, in that you can recognise their sound in a crowd of new music, instantly prick your ears up and know the guitars, the drums, the dark melodies.
It was five and a half years ago I first heard them, just the b-side of a new single, and I was instantly won over.
But it wasn't as easy as that. Recorded I find them pretty hit and miss; when they're good they're GREAT, and when they're average ... well, I just don't do average. We ignored them for a little while but then on the recommendation of a friend I found them on my music player again, another b-side, and the love started all over again.
And finally, they became one of my staple live bands in Japan. Because for all they lack recorded they are really bloody good onstage. There isn't a single OZ show I didn't enjoy, and in their honour I look forward to writing about a couple of them soon. Heck, I even have their tour final in June written in my diary for later in the year, even now. Just in case.
Thanks a lot, OZ. I wasn't with you at the start, but I'm glad to have gotten to know you better in your last days. It's been a blast.
There was none of the nerves or anxiety on the morning of the 23rd, none at all, as if the night before had absolved every worry of the weekend, and I spent over an hour on Skype with my beloved UnsraW warrior-in-arms back home, consuming the only dinner worthy of the last live.
I gathered the essentials, pulled on my Last Live tour shirt, applied none but the most essential of makeup (because let's be honest, with crazy crowds and a band with a fondness for upending water over everyone, is there really much point?), excitement and reawdiness building. And then the time came round to hang up Skype and leave, but ... I just couldn't be bothered. And I told my warrior-in-arms that I could stay around for a few more minutes but those minutes came and went, leaving me no closer to leaving and all the closer to being late. I didn't feel like being in any rush though. And then I stopped long enough to notice my fingers trembling in a way that had nothing to do with the caffeinated breakfast I had just consumed. I wasn't being lazy - I was nervous after all. Eventually and grudgingly I hung up, got my faithful gigging boots on painfully slowly, and left reluctantly. Heading to the station my nerves were turning into mild panic as I realised that when I got there I wouldn't have Crimson this time, and I wouldn't have my gig buddy who I first saw them with, and that in essence I was doing this entirely alone. I didn't have my MP3 player with me and my chest began to hurt in anxiety, and I sent a mail to maybe the only friend who would understand.
There was no reply, and I headed to the venue like it was a death sentence.
Thanks to arriving only a few minutes before doors, and being #101, there were plenty of people around to distract me, along with new flowers that had been arranged for drummer Shou's birthday just two days after the show!
Kita, Peachy and MelJay arrived just minutes after myself, and despite initial banter I was somewhat glad to see a little of my own anxiety reflected in the other three. Speaking with Kita inside the venue I discovered that we had gone through the same process - the first night was brilliant, even with its abrupt ending, and up until the hours before we had been totally at ease for this last live. It had only been recently that it had all come undone for both of us. Peachy and MelJay finally joined us and I withdrew a little to try to at least restore my heartrate to something respectable. The venue was filling up much more this time - eventually to a point where the doors couldn't close, and with a lot more men tonight too - but we had noticed the strangest thing to our right. We were stood rows strong in the centre, but in front of Madoka there were two rows of fans at the front, and then no one for three rows until the crowd started to build again - it was like there was an invisible pocket of people stood there leaving what seemed to be a complete void in the middle! But at the end of this void, against the wall, was stood a very old couple, suited and booted, looking 100% out of place and yet 100% unquestionable - there is no doubt in my mind that they were parents, whose I don't know but definitely parents. As stupid as it was I could only bow upon accidentally making eye contact, and the gentleman nodded back with a small tense smile but a tiny twinkle in his eye nonetheless. Whoever they were, I hope they enjoyed the show (and I hope they knew what to expect being so close to the stage!)
The clock ticked around to 7 and it was like the crowd all held a collective breath ... as nothing happened. The curtain drawn across the stage didn't open, the spinning lights overhead didn't go down, and too afraid to say anything people looked around at one another, either smiling tight reassuring smiles or frowning in silent confusion.
Five minutes passed and there was nothing.
Ten minutes passed.
At the fifteen minute mark I was discussing the etiquette of shouting or chanting, because all I wanted to do was break the silence, to bring everyone together, to remind the five men backstage that "Hey, we're here and we -need- you right now, before we possibly go mad and start fighting eachother" (and for the record, not shouting out is the one regret I have from this show).
We decided that they were drinking milkshake and finishing a tough game of Monopoly.
Restless, anxious and entirely too ready to start calling their names, it was twenty past when the lights finally went down, and everyone surged to the front. Now, you remember the empty rows in front of Madoka? Even in this opening rush this giant gap remained, and I was faced with a difficult decision - stay in the crush, with limited visibility and someone's elbow in my ribs, or take a single step to the right and be in second row?
Difficult indeed. In taking this side-step I was not only at the rail, not only next to the Crazy Saizen Girl from the night before (haha) and not only directly in front of Madoka, but I was also EXACTLY where I was when they played back in London, the show that will forever for me be the best live show imaginable. It was all too perfect, just too perfect.
Flames spelling "Gate of Birth" were projected onto the curtain letter by letter, and, setting the tone for the night, the intro of Gate of Death began to play. It is the most unusual and yet in this case the most fitting song to start a set with, and amid the screaming and pushing it began to really hit. This is it. Everything they do now will be the last time they do it. It will be the last time we see it.
"Remember this, give it your all, don't back down,"
～Main Show～
00.Opening SE
01.Gate of Death
02.Maria
03.under the skin
04.BREATH
05.Nightmare
06.ALIVE
07.IN THE FACT
08.WITHERING BLOOD
09.-509-
10.BEGINNING OF LOOP
11.LUST
12.腐現
13.Drum Solo
14.Rhythm Session～SEVEN
15.STARVING MOON
16.Dust To Dust
17.DRAIN
18.Social Faker
19.廻黙に照らされた夢は涙に枯れて
～Encore1～
01.休眠-おやすみ-
02.空
03.艶蝕の夢
～Encore2～
00.end of finale
01.-9-
02.嗤い鬼
The curtain opened midway through the song to reveal the band just as we had seen them the night before, each of them in their final costumes, Shou with slightly different hair and Madoka with his fishnet mask across his eyes but otherwise identical. This time however Yuuki was different. As he stood tall and looked across everyone in the crowd he seemed more composed somehow, more together, and it was equal parts entrancing and foreboding.
It was only that morning on Skype that I was mourning how they never played Maria, a firm contender for top spot in my UnsraW Top 5, and so it was like a dream come true when they powered into it after the solemn ending of Gate of Death. Yuuki's rediscovered composure seemed to be holding as the set continued, vocals just as spot on as they had been the previous night, screams just as powerful, but significantly less damning of the mic stand, much less collapsing to the floor, much less lashing out at Shou's riser. This doesn't mean that it was any less intense however, as all of the violence and aggression in his actions the last night had transformed into something less visible but more powerful; his screams were enraged, his gestures at some invisible enemy were nothing short of intimidating, his eyes as he glared at everyone in that audience, even through ice-white contacts, were pure fury.
We had him back.
It took a couple of seconds for the opening bars of Nightmare to register in my head as I really didn't expect them to play it - it is one of my favourite tracks post-hiatus and I still think it does a great job of showcasing so much that that band can do. Go, take a listen!
The crowd was just as loud as the night before during IN THE FACT, but Yuuki didn't give in this time and kept singing too, didn't let us overwhelm him. It really seemed like he was facing up to this as his last live too, that he was going to live up to his word and not let anything pass him by.
The triple-threat of IN THE FACT, -509- and WITHERING BLOOD was the same as the night before, but this time was followed by the novelty of LUST which very few of us expected, and it was spot-on live (even if shot through with pockets of insanity returning in our precious singer).
After mellowing out again to 腐現(fugen) the band left the stage, but shortly thereafter Shou returned. I expected him to be followewed byt he other instrumentalists but no, he was all alone, which could only mean one thing. He sat behind his kit and had some fun with us, hitting the drums and making us call out to him over and over, and he had a quick little chat with us too. Just like before, the man was just the personification of rainbows and puppies he really was. But despite being all laughs and smiles he seemed to struggle to find anything decent tod say, brief attempts punctuated with nervous laughter. Possibly his saving grace was when - midway through a sentence - the phone at the side of the stage started to ring. The crowd's attention was shocked and many of us stifled little giggles, but Shou took it as the sign he needed, and after getting us back with a few more call-responses he burst into the most fantastic drum solo I have seen for a long time.
This is what he came out with in 2007:
And let me say that now, five years later, he is just faster, more powerful, overall just so impressive. We were left to marvel at the man's talent as we clapped along in time, reminded that as much as Yuuki is the face of this band Shou had always been the backbone, even before UnsraW, as far back as the university-born band of 2004 that paved the way for the UnsraW we were presented with now.
As we cheered, I didn't want to say "AWESOME!" as much as I wanted to say "Thank you,".
Madoka, Tetsu and Jin returned as the solo finished, and we were once more graced with SEVEN from the night before. People clapped, people headbanged, it is simply a great track. And when Yuuki returned to complete the five-piece we once again expected a greeting, some shouts, some riling from the frontman. But again, not this time. The band continued with STARVING MOON and a rendition of Dust To Dust just as energetic as before, and closed the set with the seminal 廻黙に照らされた夢は涙に枯れて(Mawari dama ni terasa reta yume wa namida ni karete). This song, even more than warai oni, is the ultimate UnsraW encore song for me, and it means the world to me. Despite my love for it I had only ever heard the original pre-UnsraW recording, and hadn't heard UnsraW's recording until maybe a week before the live! Crazy! I couldn't believe they hadn't played it the night before, and I was so overwhelmed that they did it this night.
There was hesitation, maybe even some kind of reluctance in our encore calls this time. Where the night before they had started the second the band left the stage, this time whole seconds passed before the first voices raised themselves up. I think that we all knew that an encore represents the end of a show, and this wasn't just any show, was it?
We weren't calling for very long, and the band walked back onstage to take their places for the infamous 休眠-おやすみ- (kyuumin-oyasumi-), widely known as one of the saddest songs in the history of the world ever. It should have been a given, but I really wasn't sure if they would play it ... and it was just as tragic as I thought it would be. Yuuki sang with his arms out, reaching desperately up to someone, biting into his lip until it bled, singing -flawlessly- - again, his voice was completely perfect in a way that I never expected. Of course he sang lower at the end than higher, but the song was just ... mesmerising. 休眠-おやすみ- led into 空(sora) and 艶蝕の夢 (enshoku no yume), putting the whole crowd into a sort of suspended animation for three whole tracks, no space or will to cheer or scream. But then, when the band left, voices filled the hall louder than Yuuki ever could.
We all called for a second encore from the second they left the stage and we didn't stop, and rather than calling the token "EN-CO-RE!" we all called "UNSRAW!". Over and over and over, non-stop, no quitting and no going quiet, because ... well, we knew. They knew. Everyone there knew exactly what this was, our last chance to make demands from them and their last chance to have themselves heard. And they made us wait this time, BOY did they make us wait. But we still didn't stop, prepared to go on until our voices died out. UnsraW! UnsraW! UnsraW! Until the opening sounds of end of finale began to play, the perfect track to bring them back onstage once last time. And this time, we knew it was it. This was it. They all came out in their tour shirts bar Yuuki who was in full costume, and when he came out he gestured to each bandmember in turn, demanding well-deserved cheers for each one. Well done to you, guys.
end of finale led into a brilliant blaze-of-glory -9-, in which Yuuki sang the wonderful B-melody that I am such a big fan of. And it was during -9- that I was met with one of the sights that I know I won't forget, even if I want to.
Throughout these two shows, Yuuki had said nothing to us and had showed nothing of what he was feeling, sans the violence inflicted upon the stage equipment. He poured his all into the characters of his songs so we didn't see anything of -him-, but during -9-, for a tiny and fleeting moment at the side of his stage, expression crossed his face that was so terribly TERRIBLY sad ... it was an expression that said, quite clearly, "I don't want to be doing this". And it was brief, there one second gone the next, but I will never forget the regret etched so deeply into his half-masked face, not that he didn't want to be onstage but that he didn't want this to be the last time. And I was reminded that the closing of UnsraW, the end of their activities, were at least for him born of necessity and not want. Suddenly his anger of the night before, his fury of today, it all made sense. And the futility of it was dreadful, that there was nothing anyone could do to make everything better, that all we could do between the hundreds of us on the floor and five onstage was give it our all until we dropped ... and so that is exactly what we did, making that silent pledge as the intro to 嗤い鬼(warai oni) filled the room one last time.
Any of you play Silent Hill? The siren that goes off when things are gonna get serious? That was like the intro to warai oni at that moment.
It was entirely different from the night before, where Yuuki merely leaned into the crowd, when Madoka held the mic and did nothing about it. The band were everywhere in an instant, as were we. My ribs were entirely decimated against the rail but by this point I just couldn't care less, caught up as I was in Madoka and Tetsu switching places, Jin visiting the front of the crowd, Yuuki watching us as he sang. Everyone's distraction was the perfect cover for Yuuki's one moment of weakness however, as after just the second repeat the big guy wandered back by the drumkit with his face buried in his arm, turned away entirely from the crowd. Very shortly after he moved behind the amp alongside Shou's kit and stayed there for a while, just crouched on the floor out of most sight with his head bowed to his elbows. It had to happen at some point, and in a moment of bizarre clarity I figured that he left the front of the stage because he wanted to hide for a little, so I tore my eyes off the poor bastard and tried to catch up with what was onstage. It was only a minute later that Yuuki returned to make the scenery a little crazier ... with cups of good ol' fake blood.
Fuck you Yuuki, you brilliant, hilarious, BRILLIANT man. Not content with upending a whole cup over himself he also emptied some into the crowd, shortly followed by his trademark dousings of water. Now things were really heating up.
The band were all devils to eachother, especially Jin to the other members, as he would approach them, tap them, lean in to whisper something and then spit a whole mouthful of water directly into their faces (and in the case of Tetsu, return later to -literally- point and laugh - indeed Tetsu blogged days later about his ears still being water-logged). Jin was also possibly the only person in the world who would go for Yuuki, as - seeing how he seemed unresponsive to the "tap-and-whisper" tactic - Jin instead just spat his water at the back of the guy's head! Jin ended up in the crowd a few times, Yuuki was in the crowd many times (at one point getting himself from shimote to the middle again, just surfing across people), Madoka took Tetsu's guitar but timid lil' Tetsu wasn't keen so just hassled people. And Madoka?? He probably spent more of warai oni in the crowd than onstage, and at one point which I desperately hope is going to be on the DVD he dived at us rather than on us, taking out yours truly and many in the vicinity. Madoka, you are a full grown man, traveling at speed. Without height we're not going to catch you! Meanwhile Yuuki was causing havoc with fire extinguishers reminiscent of the Screaming Birthday DVD, which made it even harder to keep up with the chaos - you would be blinded by a wall of white fog, and by the time it cleared you would have a completely different band member in front of you/on the crate/on your head. Chaos!
I couldn't honestly tell you if 嗤い鬼 went on for five minutes or fifty, but all good things, good songs and good bands must come to an end. This end was marked by the most perfect metaphor anyone could have come up with, which I can only think of as the ultimate deconstruction. Yuuki - already having had shed his coat - stood up at the front on the crate and ripped his mask off, throwing it into the crowd. Pretty cool Yuuki. But it didn't end there. He proceeded to pull off his trademark fake lashes and cast those aside too, and he tugged at his hair, pulled it down, flattening it out as best he could. With an UnsraW towel he scrubbed at his face, got rid first of the blood and then of the makeup, and for the longest time he stood tall, arms up, the towel held high above his head as he stared wildly at everyone, no makeup, no glamour. warai oni continued, the carnage in the crowd continued, forcing disconnect between your mind - watching Yuuki - and your body - being decimated by wave after wave of the same refrain. Eventually he rested the towel over his face and stood still while the others played around him, and so by the end of it, before the song finished and he collapsed to the crate, to his knees, to the floor in front of the drumkit, he was ... just ... ordinary Yuuki, the Yuuki he was before the lashes and the lipstick and before UnsraW.
The song finally finished and he stayed lying down at the bottom of Shou's kit for a long time. The other members wandered the front of the stage a bit, grabbed some hands, threw some picks (one of Madoka's hitting me in the eye, thanks for that, mate). Shou finally half-ventured into the crowd. Yuuki finally stood up and hassled some people, and Madoka, Tetsu and Shou hung back together in a straight line on the right of the stage, watching him. Madoka was on the verge of tears. Jin, still in his corner, was turned away from the crowd with his hands over his face, and I'm pretty sure he was crying too. For the longest time Madoka, Tetsu and Shou hovered awkwardly, sometimes grinning, sometimes smiling, sometimes mumbling to eachother, sometimes looking at the crowd, sometimes watching their frontman, until eventually with small bows to the crowd they left silently, crept away. Jin followed shortly after in the same manner, no big hurrahs, just leaving the stage quickly while Yuuki continued to say his own wordless goodbyes. His face without makeup was so shockingly different. In these final goodbyes he no longer had any of the fury of when he sang, or any of the sorrow or regret of 休眠-おやすみ- and -9-. I can't say he was peaceful, but he had definitely made his peace as best he could. In the end he ripped his shirt off entirely and left, and a new piano version of 休眠-おやすみ- began to play to finish the show.
(this was a secret track on a release from CoЯe the Child, the band before UnsraW, which features the 休眠-おやすみ- melody - it's the best I could do)
With no one onstage the crowd was left to their own devices, and while 休眠-おやすみ- played out people just stood there and cried. Holding onto the bar with one hand I was in too much shock to cry at first, too much shock and gratitude, too much everything really. Marvel at what I had seen, the terrible sinking feeling that I would never experience a show that amazing again, the realisation that once I got out of the livehouse every bit of damage that the show had inflicted upon me would hit threefold. I looked up and the girl to my left was by herself, surrounded by friends who had collapsed on eachother, who were hugging eachother and crying together. She was trying not to cry there by herself, and with a little smile I took her hand, and told her simply, "Me too,". And she broke down and held on tightly, and I decided to take advantage of just where I was. Yuuki wanted UnsraW closed, wanted this done with, and while the last part of the song played out I thought back to the amazing memories I had with that band, that band that had done so god damn much for me, that had shown me some of the best live performances I had ever seen and who represented a whole shitton of important things for so many people.
Voices were raised again, but not "ENCORE!" this time, and not "UNSRAW!". Instead people were shouting thank yous, thank yous to Yuuki, thank yous to the band. Breaking into a grin I shouted my thanks too, and shook the hand that was holding onto mine in encouragement. The girl next to me tried a smile too, and she shouted, but her voice gave out and so we just laughed together, counted to three and shouted once more as one. And as the piano wound to a sad, quiet close we all began to disperse. Without even caring for names the girl alongside me and I shared thank yous and take cares, and I reunited with Kita, Peachy and MelJay in an emotional little ball. We stayed together for a while, jokes were shared, observations notes, bonding a massive amount in a tiny space of time before we left to go our seperate ways.
And thankfully I didn't start crying until I was halfway home.
It was an amazing show, and just what it needed to be. No overemotional and awkward speeches, no ridiculous melodrama, just ... just a bloody good live. And as frustrating as it may be, it's also quite nice knowing that no live I ever see will surpass those of this band. The gratitude I have to them is greater than the sorrow of losing them.
There is no signal in EDGE, and so I only started getting mails and messages on the train home, and it seems that the friend I mailed at the start of the day had replied a couple of hours prior:
"Don't be scared.
You need this, and you need to go through this with just you and your feelings for the band.
I don't have a clue what happened in June 1st-21st other than a handful of lives fated to be overshadowed by this one weekend and one live which was admittedly jaw-droppingly amazing (but that can be written about at a later date). One thing that didn't happen much was meeting up with my lovely Crimson, and so in celebration we decided to meet up a few hours early so we could relax and catch up. Always quick to remind me that it's always midnight somewhere, Crimson suggested midday drinks and we sat in the nearest restaurant to finally have a long-overdue natter, but despite trying my best I'm pretty sure that every other thing I said featured some varient of the word "UnsraW".
It was only when sinking a follow-up iced tea (with essence of honey lozenge for poorly-guts here) that I finally realised how nervous I was, although god knows why. Was I worried about what they would play? No. Was I worried about what they would look like? No (although this was indeed an uncertainty we'll cover in a moment). Was I afraid of what the crowd would be like? No, because I had already vowed to myself not to let any amount of shitty gig-goers ruin my experience - having never seen UnsraW on home turf I had never experienced an UnsraW crowd, and only had very mixed opinions to go by. I didn't know why I was nervous, all I knew is how badly my hands were shaking, and how dangerously high my resting heart-rate had become.
(flowers outside the venue, welcoming back Madoka and for the whole band)
By the time we returned to the venue they were letting the first fifty people in, and as numbers 26 and 27 we made out way to queue on the stairs. As staff came and went I caught a glimpse at the merch table and cursed under my breath, because I hadn't intended on buyging anything for myself but the designs were simply gorgeous! More on those later.
On the way past the merch table we were handed flyers for a special memorial box, available for people who attended the shows. Why thank you very much! Fold that up, cram it in a pocket and hope that it's still legible in three hours.
(Update: it survived!)
Crimson and I got ourselves into the hall safe and sound and right into second row, comfortably between guitarist Madoka and vocalist Yuuki just as we had planned. Only moments later we were also joined by the wonderful tribe of Kita, MelJay and Peachy from over on ~Twisted in Tokyo~ (and no, I'm still not over the shock of meeting such lovely people), and as the venue filled around us we joked about how our lovely pocket of foreigners all seemed to congregate in front of Madoka. We talked animatedly about a whole myriad of things, from cult-related musical drama to our own respective hassles of getting tickets ... one thing we didn't talk about however was UnsraW themselves, or what lay ahead, and rather we left the topic acknowledged only silently, our conversation growing stunted as the minutes of Senor Owl (I forgot his name!) ticked by agonisingly slowly. However, slow as it might have been those minutes did indeed tick, and they ticked until we had been inside for just over a full hour, and the lights finally went down. Crimson grabbed my hand, and in a moment of simultaneous weakness and gratitude I remember sort of wishing that she'd never let go.
It has to be said that end of finale is one hell of an amazing opener, not only giving something to get the crowd riled up with bbut allowing a prescribed moment for each band member to appear onstage and drink in their own individual reactions. Which is exactly what they did. Drummer Shou was the first to appear and already from the get-go there was no pretense of "cool" or "hardcore" - this man has a smile like a rainbow. It first hit me like a tonne of bricks back in 2010 in snowy-cold Munich and it was still there in frozen London, and here it was again effortlessly lighting up a room which had every right to be simply pitch black. Bassist Jin appeared next, jumping up on the crate and flashing a cheeky grin flled with his favourite vampire fangs (I can neither explain nor endorse these), and with just these two first members already the anxiety, the trepidation, it was all disappating. It seemed that nothing had changed, nothing was different, no feelings here were any different than they had been one yewar ago, two years ago. The track continued and out came guitarist Tetsu, who was shortly followed by fellow guitarist Madoka, and aside from the latter having had removed his facial piercings they were the guitarists we had always known, Tetsu observant, a creature of his own and slow to smile, Madoka twitchy to a fault but something strangely alive behind those silver-blue contacts tonight, much more watchful as if he was searching the entire hall for something, lips glossy-red and tense. Shou, Jin and Madoka had all been playing in session bands or as support up until this point, but this was the first time any of us had seen Madoka since the bands original last live back in 2011; it was good to see that not much had changed.
Madoka took his place in front of us and then there was only one person left, and ... the feeling there and then in that crowd became one of the highlights across both nights, a highlight I could never even hope to put into words. The song played its way through innocently enough as if it didn't know what it was about to introduce, while the tension in the crowd rose to impossible heights, one giant hive mind knowing and damn well needing the one thing it knew it was finally going to get.
I felt Crimson's hand give a little under mine as I probably held on too tight, and then, right then, it was finally safe to let go.
Yuuki strode forward and up onto his crate like it was second nature, like he had been practicing that stride every day for the entire past year, and the crowd surged and cried out, screamed and shouted and it simply wasn't enough. He pounded the microphone against his chest and demanded more, demanded that we reach deep and let out everything we had never been able to show him until now. And he fed on all of it.
I mentioned the uncertainty of what they would look like, and when I said "they" I mostly meant "Yuuki". Over the years we've seen Yuuki morph like a damn shapeshifter, he has been almost unhealthily thin and he has been much stockier than your average vocalist, and we have seen him lose weight but retain his ridiculous muscle mass, and after a year we had no way of predicting just how he would look now. I was surprised to see the whole band back in their final costumes, but although Yuuki definitely wasn't looking as thin as he has in the past his outfit was quite literally hanging off him. A mixture of eras, while he wore his final costume his hair was the same black and blonde as Reborn in 2009, and brilliantly enough he wore a mask from the early years, not entirely unlike Abel in '07. The perfect emalgumation of everyone he had been. He shouted furiously at us with the cumalative power of their six years behind him, like nothing we could give him was enough. In retrospect, maybe this was a recurring trend for the big guy, who back in April asked who could save him. We would give it our best shot.
The band powered into -9- before the dust could even try to settle, before any of us could gather our senses long enough to realise where we were, what we were doing, what was happening, nd without pausing for thought they drove ruthlessly on into REBORN right afterwards. It's yet another thing I can't put into words, but it really was a trial by fire, Level 10 - the band tore the stage up, starting the show with all the intensity of an encore and showing no sign of letting up. In the precious seconds between songs you would expect Yuuki to say something, a greeting, a question, even some rousing one-liner, but we weren't to be treated with such courtesy. Yuuki was in no mood to speak. Rather, his mood was ... throughout the whole live he was astonishingly violent, sometimes to a legitimately disturbing degree. He pounded the mic against his chest as if he wanted to drive it throughto the bone. He stomped furiously on the crate until at one point I thought he would go through it. Tortured, he would aim kicks at the poor thing or at Shou's riser, he would fall to his knees and he would strike the floor with the side of his fist before giving up entirely and faling still, breathing hard, trembling at the fingertips. Early in the set he ripped his coat off and threw it to the ground like it was a personal disgrace to him, and as for the mic stand ... god knows what he was seeing when he looked at that thing, but for whole songs he would sing directly to it, wander the stage with it in fact, before eventually snapping and casting it aside or throwing it to the stage, so hard that at one point something flew off it upon impact. I suppose that on a personal level it made me a little sad, because his frustration was so tangible and we had all been hoping that he would have been able to reconcile these things within himself before now.
IN THE FACT has always been one of my favourite songs, ever since that fateful January 2007, not just by UnsraW but by any band ever, and as much as it was a given that they would play it it is still never any less amazing. Only this time I think that the band finally started to understand the crowd that they were dealing with. As the song heats up to the chorus the crowd started to shout in time with the music, seeming to get louder and louder each time, until you couldn't hear Yuuki over the noise we were making, and so for the final repeat the guy just gave up, letting us shout our way up until the scream he lets out at the beginning of the chorus. This scream, by the way, was executed perfectly, which is something I definitely want to make a point of. No UnsraW fan out there is going to say that Yuuki has a perfect voice, not by a mile, but ... whatever he's done over the last year, it's done no harm to his singing. Every song throughout the whole night was pitch-perfect, above his normal standards at lives. Screams = flawless. Particularly high or low notes = no problem. I don't know if it was something he was consciously aware of or something that just came together for him at the end, but ... it was a brilliant thing.
After a surprising little voyage into the Guilty mini-album with WITHERING BLOOD they launched mercilessly into -509-, another one of my absolute favourite UnsraW songs since they brought it into their arsenal on the European tour in 2010, and after easing off a little with 腐現 Yuuki left the stage, leaving the other four musicians to take the spotlight. Shou started off to rile us up a little and I figured the guy was going to get himself a little solo, but before long Jin joined in, making a kind of rhythm team mash up (I have to say here that while I have never considered Jin sexy per sé, the way he moved right then when it was just the drums and bass was quite entrancing - I've never notice him become so involved in his playing before). Not too long after this Madoka and Tetsu joined in too, creating what we finally know to be the brilliant instrumental interlude that is SEVEN. Goodness me, brilliant would be an understatement. The whole piece was dark and heavy, the kind of UnsraW i love best and very reminiscent of something from the final Kleza singles, making me quite sure that this was going to be a track lined up for the future album that never was. People in the crowd were totally getting into it, occassionally headbanging and enjoying the whole song even without vocals. I remember desperately trying to fix this track in my mind, simply too good to forget. Dust To Dust is a song that had completely consumed me for whole months before this live and so experiencing it live again was a real pleasure, people diving into the front rows with insane force (and insane elbows ...), and Social Faker is a force to be reckoned with live as well, but these really were only warm-ups for the chaos that is 嗤い鬼.
嗤い鬼 is UnsraW's classic closing track, a song that recorded checks in at under 3 minutes but live tends to go beyond 10 as the second portion of the song is looped mercilessly, giving the band a chance to destroy the crowd through any means necessary (when the crowd aren't destroying themselves). Although it has to be said, this time 'round the band remained amazingly restrained. Yuuki occassionally leaned into the crowd to grab at people, Tetsu occassionally snapped at people's outstretched hands and true, some water ended up over the front rows, but that was about the extent of it. Throughout the song however I couldn't help but be distracted by Madoka, who when I last saw them was the King of trouble-making onstage. This time 'round he didn't challenge the crowd at all, rarely left his side of the stage at all, and a very sad moment that Kita also mentioned over on her blog was when, amidst the chaos, he stopped playing and took the mic in both hands, leaning into it and looking uncertain before simply bowing his head and not saying a word. He carried on playing as normal but it seemed wrong, a whole round of their most crazy song without having to fear the man jumping into us :/ What I was cautious of was how the girl in front of me had climbed half onto the rail, so that rather than being thrown against her back with each dive my hip was thrown into the heel of her boot. Not impressed, crazy saizen girl, not impressed. I found an entire bottle of water upended over my head at the end of the track (from either Yuuki or Madoka, the memory alludes me now), leaving me laughing with my hair over my eyes despire crazy saizen girl as the band left the stage, and immediately everyone called for an encore (or rather, instead of calling "ENCORE!" everyone cried out "UNSRAW!"). They didn't keep us waiting long and gave a short little two-song encore, Yuuki having not relaxed in the slightest and still going slightly insane during 艶蝕の夢 in particular, shaking and screaming at the mic stand once more. And I guess that a two-song encore just wasn't enough because entirely unsated I think we started calling them back before they even completely left the stage again. This time when they came back they were all wearing the beautiful wonderful fantastic shirts from the merch desks, cementing in my head the need to get one. Yuuki's in particular did a great job of showing off just how much muscle the guy had, and I was genuinely shocked at how he had seemed to lose weight and yet still keep those incredible arms! They took their time this time, wandering the front of the stage, grinning like proud children and really enjoying being back. A lengthy and double handshake from Shou while the guy grinned down at me was enough to keep this little blogger happy and after drinking in their audience's shouts they took their places again and Yuuki in turn shouted for us to bring it on, and they closed their set (very strangely) with WINE, another personal favourite that delivers precious memories from London 2010. Just like in London, Yuuki had the crowd clapping over his shrieks in the middle, chasing us up with those horrifyingly perfect deep growls before each chorus. At one point the saizen girl in front of me (who we shan't discuss too much *glower*) draped herself double over the rail, and in a moment of hilarity Madoka walked forward, gave her the most confused look, and rested his foot on her head. Made me pretty happy at least!
With just this one unusual encore track however they abruptly left once more without ceremony, no thank yous, no goodbyes, barely anything thrown out in the way of drumsticks or guitar picks, leaving a very confused crowd quite unsure of what to do. It didn't take long for people to start shouting again, through the sad outro music, through the pre-recorded message from the venue telling us to clear the hell out, but to no avail. We left with conflicting feelings of exhiliration and confusion, content and yet unsettled. I was glad to have a ticket for the next day because if that had been my last show I wouldn't've known how to feel. They played perfectly, no better than normal but with no sense of sadness or sorrow (apart from our brief moment with Madoka ...), it was like a regular Friday night show, and I guess that's what made it so amazing. It did make me all the more anxious for the next day however. After the show I took a chance and hassled someone I thought I recognised and it paid off, it turned out to be Luna, an acquaintance I'd met some 18 months back online who had flown out just for the weekend, and living up to our vow of taking Before And After photos Crimson and I kidnapped our new friend for some post-live purikura. Bidding farewell to Crimson myself and Luna stayed out in Ikebukuro, discussing the show, the band and their future, and amazed to have met another super-wonderful person I nearly missed my last train home. It was only when I did get back home that I realised just how content I felt, and that I embraced the feeling that the next day, the last live, everything might just be alright after all.
Easy-going month, time to cut back on underwhelming multi-bands and pick out the ones I really want to stick with - I refuse to be one of those girls who goes to shows because they're shows, you know? Also, you know, the Yens don't seem to like me all that much right now :/
July 13th (FRI)
girugamesh - Sadistic Year 2012 #1
@ Shibuya O-EAST
(about time I hit up the boys for a oneman on home turf, right?)
July 21st (SAT)
MEJIBRAY/Screw/ALSDEAD/ベルベット et al
@ Takadanobaba AREA
(I know I know, less multibands, but these four in one night?)
July 23rd (MON)
TRIGGAH - RUN OUT OF BULLETS
TRIGGAH / ALSDEAD / Nocturnal Bloodlust
@ Meguro rock-may-kan
(hilarious coincidence, just before this lineup was announced I was saying how I'd love to see the three of these play together!)
(In which Break lets loose quite a bit of rambling - it is what she does best)
I can't claim to be one of those fans who has loved UnsraW through and through. I fell for them the instant I heard -9- at the end of 2006, and then I fell even harder when I heard Spiral Circle at the beginning of 2007, but then it tapered off. They released Calling the following March which I didn't like, and later that year they released the Abel and Kein mini-albums which to this day I'm still not a fan of. But over and over I would come back to Spiral Circle and just listen to it on a loop. Yuuki's voice is far (far far) from perfect, the guitarists are good but not exactly inspiring, I will admit that as far as skill goes the points have to go to drummer Shou because that man is seriously underrated behind that drumkit.
Of course then Yuuki became sick and the band went on their year-long hiatus, and still I couldn't stand their mini-albums, still I looped Spiral Circle. And somehow, in this year-long silence, their power seemed to grow without me realising it. When they announced their comeback it was like Christmas come early to me, the excitement was unbelievable. I don't know how or when they began to meant that much, as far as I was concerned they were just an interesting band who released a brilliant album and then couldn't quite sustain it, but with their announcement it felt like I had regained something big, something I never thought I'd have back, something I never realised I had lost. Undeterred by the immediate loss of their bassist they ploughed on with a new single release and it was an UnsraW I never imagined, an UnsraW who weren't picking up from where they left off but who had grown and transformed in their year off, not just in sound either. Gone were the masks, gone were the skin-flashing costumes (for a while at least), and the vocalist Yuuki had gone from being gangly and probably too thin to a ridiculously intimidating powerhouse of a man. Their lyrics had changed. Their production had changed. And they had turned into a band that demanded the attention and respect that they might just be due.
They announced their first EU tour and despite it not coming to our fair British isles I insisted on going. My gig-buddy was hesitant and to this day I still don't know why I was so persistant, but just months later we were treading back through fresh Munich snow trying to find words to express how that might just have been the best live show ever.
They lost a guitarist and quickly replaced him, finally getting a new official bassist too, and went on to release another mini-album which was just as brilliant as the single. Within the same year they announced ANOTHER EU tour which we of course attended, which left us saying "We thought that Munich was probably the best show ever, but this was without a DOUBT the best live we've ever seen". They released three more singles, and then of course What Happened Happened, Yuuki suddenly left for his own reasons and the band disbanded after their last live. This is no place to discuss that. We carried on. The members played session lives, became support members, we relistened to old songs (Spiral Circle, Spiral Circle) and found new gems, and the world turned round and round. Spurred on by the lessons learned in watching them your humble blogger here uprooted and moved herself across the planet almost entirely alone.
March 14th, after travelling a circuit around Hiroshima, Osaka and Kyoto we returned to our beloved Tokyo, put up coincidentally in Room 509, and read the news that UnsraW would be returning for one last live, with five members, with Yuuki onstage again. The rest, I guess, is history.
Most of everyone reassured me that it wouldn't sell out, not quickly at least, but just for the fun of it I set myself the challenge of getting a ticket the very minute they were released. Lucky I did, because they were sold out by the time I left the store. And quite taken aback themselves I think, the band announced a second live (or a prequel I suppose?) the day before the last live, and in the name of fairness I decided not to get a ticket - if I didn't, someone who missed out on the original tickets would get a chance. But it turns out that I am only human, and my resolve held strong until I had a particularly bad day just a couple of days before the second launch (a bad day that called upon the need for coffee jelly with vanilla icecream, AND iced cocoa in one sitting) (... it was bad). Cue the calling in of favours, cue the brilliant Bloody Fashionista rolling out of bed early on her day off and mailing me that she had got us both tickets
I don't know where time has gone between now and then. I spent a long time conflicted about the last lives altogether actually, after the remaining four members had given their all to an amazing last live last year and then being called back to do it again with their vocalist. But I realise that that doesn't matter. All conflict put aside it is now just a few days until I see the conclusion of the best and most inspiring live band I've ever seen, and ... well. UnsraW are my last fandom. I guess we'll see what I have to say afterwards.
